Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.

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(248): Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on. http://tfl.nu/7zdh

Replies (2) Good night (1596) Bad night (732)
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(585): View more from New York

I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.

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(585): I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town. http://tfl.nu/h13y

Replies (1) Good night (1221) Bad night (615)
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(415): View more from California

well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart

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(415): well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart http://tfl.nu/6v8e

Replies (17) Good night (7822) Bad night (687)
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(607): View more from New York

Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?

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(607): Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved? http://tfl.nu/p303

Replies (20) Good night (3883) Bad night (1064)
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(515): View more from Iowa

the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me

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(515): the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me http://tfl.nu/qt23

Replies (11) Good night (5101) Bad night (951)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.

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(978): I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine. http://tfl.nu/u4oj

Replies (8) Good night (2861) Bad night (952)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.

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(404): Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken. http://tfl.nu/s1v7

Replies (10) Good night (1110) Bad night (2880)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.

(309): View more from Illinois

Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?

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(618): Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off. (309): Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay? http://tfl.nu/53dx

Replies (4) Good night (1324) Bad night (2462)
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(641): View more from Iowa

I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

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(641): I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. http://tfl.nu/90tm

Replies (18) Good night (1245) Bad night (1416)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night

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(978): hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night http://tfl.nu/n6zz

Replies (3) Good night (2046) Bad night (629)
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(765): View more from Indiana

That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.

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(765): That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk. http://tfl.nu/c4df

Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (1647)
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(540): View more from Virginia

His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.

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(540): His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me. http://tfl.nu/adz0

Replies (5) Good night (577) Bad night (713)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave

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(919): he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave http://tfl.nu/tg51

Replies (2) Good night (530) Bad night (420)
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(+33): View more from France

He asked me how france is treating me

(312): View more from Illinois

Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away

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(+33): He asked me how france is treating me (312): Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away http://tfl.nu/omtr

Replies (9) Good night (945) Bad night (389)
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(804): View more from Virginia

I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.

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(804): I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying. http://tfl.nu/bp4d

Replies (3) Good night (424) Bad night (180)

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