Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
