this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
