I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Randomize
