so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
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when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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