the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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