and next time when you feel me up, do it right
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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