Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He felt like a one man threesome
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Never underestimate the power of titties
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
