the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
