i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
