How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
