My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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