So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Randomize