jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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