I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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