go do what you do best...puke behind churches
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
