you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize