I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
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