Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
nutella sex= disaster
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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