OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
