if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
