Is it because I queefed?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize