i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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