Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Sorry about my life...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
