12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
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