She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
