there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize