Porn is love you can see.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He's on the porch naked. Help.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
