I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
