She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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