Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
