I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Even my vagina gasped.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
