I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
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