All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
