Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
