sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize