Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize