apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
be right there i have to get my cape
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
