# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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