So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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