I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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