I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
