Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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