I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
should my penis look like a turkey
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
