i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize