Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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