Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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