Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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