He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Randomize
