he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
