Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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